From Deseret News archives:

5 victims describe harrowing passages

Mothers, children tell how they've created new lives

Published: Thursday, March 29, 2007 12:31 p.m. MDT
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"Jane Smith" tolerated the periodic pushes and shoves. She hid the bruises on her arms and legs. But her husband's constant stream of degrading comments cut her to the core. Those scars didn't easily heal.

"You're stupid."

"You couldn't function without me."

"You are a bad mother."

"You can't make a decision."

"You're so fat that nobody would ever want to look at you, and I don't know why I do."

The barrage didn't stop at home. He demoralized her in public, too.

"That's the stupidest thing I ever heard."

"Who wants to hear anything you have to say."

Jane came to be what she heard.

"I would believe that people I met at social gatherings wouldn't remember me because I was not worth remembering," she said.

A glass of wine with dinner wasn't unusual for the Smiths early in their marriage. But John's consumption changed over time. He often retreated to the basement with a bottle of wine and the remote control. He watched TV until the bottle was empty. As his drinking escalated, so did the vitriol.

"I think the verbal and emotional abuse were the worst things to endure up until the last incident," she said.

Jane had finally taken all the belittling and bruising she could handle. She resolved to leave her husband of 30 years.

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"The mistake that I made was that I told him I was leaving after my daughter graduated from high school. I didn't have a safety plan in place."

It almost got her killed.

A week after the graduation in 2003, Jane was in the kitchen when her husband returned from a business trip. He walked in drunk and said a new job prospect looked good.

"It won't stay good if you don't quit drinking," she told him.

"So you think I'm not good enough," he retorted.

And then the pummeling began.

He pinned her against the sink, threw her to the floor and beat her face with an open hand. He grabbed her by the hair and slammed her face against the tile floor.

"Beg me not not try my fist," he screamed.

He then grabbed a knife from the rack next to the sink.

"I'll kill you," he threatened. "You're so insignificant."

The blade grazed her nose.

"Beg me not use this knife. Beg me. I want to see you grovel."

Jane's eyes were swollen shut, and she faded in and out of consciousness. Blood dripped to the floor.

When the beating stopped, she heard him take the car keys from her purse, disconnect the telephone lines and go downstairs.

Dizzy and bleeding, Jane crawled to the door leading to the garage. She got into her car where she had left her cell phone and dialed 911.

Jane survived; John went to prison, though he is out now. Jane has a new life and a rewarding job.

"I am so much better off. I am so happy. I can't tell you how happy I am. I feel the best I have in my whole life."

Her children distanced themselves from their father as they grew older. And the relationship remains strained. They don't want him to influence their kids.

"They've told me they've lost their father," she said. "To say they've lost their father when he's still living is a sad statement."

— Dennis Romboy

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At left, Susan and her daughter have found a better, though occasionally uncertain, life in Park City.

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