9. Know the psyche. A devout LDS friend once explained to me the fundamental characteristics of Mormons: Members believe the true Gospel has been restored; the Church president is a living prophet; and "they" are coming to get you. Such paranoia is logical in considering LDS Church history — Nauvoo, the Utah War, imprisoning church leaders. This doesn't justify every action of LDS members, but it does explain many of them.

10. Always remember, this is a great place to live. Obviously, there are lots of scenic and recreational opportunities in the state. But without Mormons, there would be no Utah, and the I-15 corridor would be a string of mediocre communities. Utah is a thriving region for education and the arts because of its people. This dynamic is a real boon for us Gentiles. We get a metropolitan lifestyle and yet no crowds on Sunday at the ski resorts or Costco.

Supplemental Rule — Marry a Mormon. I did, and I have food storage in the basement and thousands of in-laws.

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Democrat Frank Pignanelli is a Salt Lake attorney, lobbyist and political adviser. A former candidate for Salt Lake mayor, he served 10 years in the Utah House of Representatives, six years as House minority leader. Pignanelli's spouse, D'Arcy Dixon Pignanelli, is a Utah state tax commissioner. E-mail: frankp@xmission.com. Republican LaVarr Webb , who will return next week, was policy deputy to Gov. Mike Leavitt and Deseret News managing editor. He now is a political consultant and lobbyist. E-mail: lwebb@exoro.com.