Strengthen bonds with divorced mom

My parents are divorced, and my stepmom got me a bracelet. When I wore it around my mom, she got upset. What do I do? —Carm, 13, Tucson, Ariz.

Let's start with the positive: It's so great that you're getting along with your stepmother — don't change that! I'm assuming that's the case, because you're wearing the gift she got you (a sign you like the person who gave it to you!). So often, that's a huge issue in stepfamilies, since you can't choose the people your parents fall in love with. But that doesn't make the situation with your mom any easier, I know.

The reality is, your mom is human, and she likely has very complicated feelings about your dad. In a perfect world, she would keep you out of it so you wouldn't be made to feel uncomfortable. But show me someone who lives in a perfect world and I will buy a pink unicorn from her.

My guess: The bracelet is a sign to your mother that not only has your father moved on with his life but also that you have. You need to show her there is not a set amount of space in your heart — that you have room in your heart to love her as much as you did before the divorce and that no one will take her place in your life.

We often take that for granted — parents knowing how much we love them. But when their world is feeling shaky (and divorce certainly does that!), they can doubt even the obvious — we all can! An idea: Make a weekly date with your mom. This gesture will send her the signal that you want to spend time with her. It could be as simple as breakfast every Sunday (you can make something special together at home or even go to a local diner). It doesn't have to be a super-serious conversation — you can use that time to chat.

But it sends a serious message — that she is important to you. Plus, having open communication will only help your relationship progress. Maintaining a strong relationship with anyone takes a lot of hard work, and it's a little more complex with parents when they are divorced. But since you asked the question, I can tell this relationship is important to you, so your hard work will be worth it. Good luck!

This girl at school is continually calling me names because she thinks I'm trying to steal her boyfriend, but I'm not. (Her boyfriend and my boyfriend are best friends.) Then, after school, there will be a message from her saying how sorry she is and that we should be friends — but two days later, she's back at it! What should I say? — Kait, 15, Oil City, Pa.