Attorney General Mark Shurtleff is perusing "The Official Handbook of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy" (Mark W. Smith) for tips on how he can be loved once again by ultraconservatives. (Note to General Shurtleff: This book attempts to debunk the notion of a right-wing conspiracy. But we know better. Hillary Clinton confirmed it's out there.)

Paul Mero, president of the Sutherland Institute, will be reading "All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten" (Robert Fulghum). Although this conservative think tank has openly demanded the elimination of mandatory kindergarten, his former kindergarten teacher has threatened to withhold milk and cookies if he doesn't read it.

Legislative Democrats will ponder a best seller, "The Purpose-Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here For?" (Rick Warren). They will spend the summer searching for a reason for their existence.

Legislative Republicans are looking forward to the multivolume "The Complete Works of Dr. Seuss" (Dr. Seuss). These famous classics are family friendly, moral laden, well-illustrated and easy to read even for legislators. And they don't make references to alternative lifestyles. (Well, we do have our suspicions about Thing One and Thing Two in "Cat in the Hat.")

New Democratic State Chairman Wayne Holland Jr. is boning up on "Hardcore Self Defense" (C. R. Jahn). He figures he will need all of the martial arts skills he can get when he takes the Democratic platform on the road outside of Salt Lake County.

Congressman Chris Cannon hopes to read "The Hammer: Tom DeLay: God, Money, and the Rise of the Republican Congress" (Lou Dubose) to remind him why he is supporting the embattled House Majority Leader. He also intends to gain more insights on how to deal with illegal aliens by reading "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" (John Gray).

Congressman Jim Matheson has started his review of "A Deficit of Decency" (Zell Miller). Matheson hopes to learn from Zell, the homespun Democratic senator who starred at last year's GOP national convention, a variety of strategies to antagonize fellow Democrats while increasing popularity among Republicans.

Sen. Bob Bennett is dog-earing his volume of "The Hope of Living Long and Well" (Francisco Contreras). With the right genes (his dad lived to be 95) and a healthy lifestyle, he can reach for another two terms (and let Hatch worry about Huntsman and Mike Leavitt in 2012). Bennett is also rereading "All the President's Men" (Woodward and Bernstein) just to be sure he isn't, after all, Deep Throat.