Best wishes: '05 resolutions for Utah politicos

Every January Utahns make pledges to lose weight, start exercising, stop procrastinating, be sweet spouses/significant others, and stop hating (take your pick) BYU or the U. of U. Here are some 2005 New year's resolutions for Utah politicos:

Pignanelli: Utah congressional delegation: Resolve to exploit shamelessly the fact Utah has twice given George W. Bush the largest vote margin in order to squeeze the administration for goodies.

Bill Orton: Resolve to announce his decision regarding a candidacy for U.S. Senate — before the end of the year.

Utah's banks and credit unions: Resolve to refrain from calling each other "monetary terrorists and money-lending sleaze." (No promises regarding "white-collar scum.")

Utah legislators: Resolve to give Gov. Jon Huntsman Jr.'s tax reform proposal a respectable amount of consideration (at least a week) before dumping most of it into a task force.

Senate President John Valentine and Lt. Gov. Gary Herbert: Resolve, in a mutual act of charity, to let the other think that he is the most powerful person in state government from Utah County.

Peter Corroon: Resolve at least once a week to remind Randy Horiuchi who is the council member and who is the mayor.

Utah Democrats: Resolve to refrain from using the cultural term "unrighteous dominion" when describing Republicans.

Utah Republicans: Resolve to refrain from using the cultural term "godless liberals" when describing Democrats.

Frank Pignanelli: Resolve, that when confronting the inane rhetoric of LaVarr Webb and his fellow conservatives, to avoid the usual outbursts of distress and anger and offer a prayer of pity for these poor souls burdened with smaller volumes of gray matter.

Webb: State legislators, staff and (especially) lobbyists: Resolve to shower daily. Otherwise, things are going to get ripe in a hurry in the new tight legislative quarters on Capitol Hill.

Sierra Club: Resolve to stop whining (and threatening lawsuits) about the Legacy Parkway. The "transit first" demand is being met with commuter rail. Every transit option AND the Legacy Parkway are necessary to keep commerce humming. Go do something productive, like taking a long hike in a wilderness study area.