Olsen's own experience is a tapestry woven with pain. She lost a 15-year-old son 10 years ago in a tragic car accident that left her entire family grief-stricken. Attending a Michigan support center was a turning point for the Olsens and the inspiration for Canary Garden.

While the Sharing Place in Salt Lake offers a similar service, Olsen said she wanted to provide a closer option for Utah County children who have suffered the loss of a family member. Funded entirely with donations and grants, the center opened in May and now serves 11 families with the help of local volunteers.

"I had three friends die in high school and it kind of motivated me to help other kids," said volunteer Cassandra Aamodt. "I remember that I felt like no one cared, no one understood and no one was listening. So I can relate."

The children can also relate to each other, which is the key ingredient to Canary Garden's support formula. While painting or writing in journals or playing games, the kids talk about the challenge of discussing death with their school friends.

"The principal at my school said it would be best not to tell anybody," says Calen's 12-year-old brother, Gage, while drawing a picture of the car he would give J.J. if he were still around.

The other pre-teens chime in and begin sharing their own stories, coming to the general consensus that the phrase, "I know how you feel," is the worst thing that someone can say . . . unless it's coming from their support group.

That peer understanding, Olsen said, is essential to the healing process, which dulls the pain of death. Of course, she added, lost ones can never be forgotten.

A letter Sheri Jenson, 12, wrote to her brother Cody — the victim of a neurological disease — says it best.

"Dear Cody, I love you and miss you," Sheri writes. "When you left you kind of took a piece of me, but I also took a piece of you, too. I stored it away in a place that it can never leave — my heart."

---

E-MAIL: lwarner@desnews.com