From Deseret News archives:
Signs of the times? Civility may be at all-time low
There are more than enough jerks to go around.
From bullying on the playground and in the workplace to abusing handicapped parking privileges to language packed with enough four-letter words it would make people at your granddad's Navy reunion blush. Yes, civility seems to be at an all-time low. Rudeness reigns in our stressed and impatient society.
Not surprising, a Deseret News/KSL-TV poll shows Utahns don't think we are as nice to each other as we were 10 years ago, although ironically, most don't consider themselves any less well-mannered or polite.
According to the survey conducted by Dan Jones & Associates, 67 percent of respondents say people have definitely or probably become less civil during the past decade. Only 11 percent say Utahns are more civil, while 14 percent didn't discern a difference.
Of those who perceived the community as less civil, more than 90 percent identified language, driving and cell phone use as areas where manners have definitely slipped. Others listed were dress, table manners, customer service, youth sports and e-mail.
"People, in general, in surveys see the problem but very seldom do they see themselves as part of the problem," said P.M. Forni, director of the Civility Project at Johns Hopkins University.
Forni, an authority on civil behavior, has written two books on the subject, "Choosing Civility" and a follow-up titled "The Civility Solution" due out in June. The former contains 25 rules of considerate conduct, while the latter includes the "Terrible Ten" rudest behaviors and how to deal with them. He identified schools, workplaces and roads as places that seem to bring out the worst in people.
"When we talk about good manners, first and foremost, we do not talk about which fork to choose for the salad," he said. "We're talking about how we treat one another."
And why should we bother with civility, good manners and politeness?
Because, Forni says, the quality of our lives is at stake.
"Social skills make us likable. Being likable allows us to enjoy good relationships. Good relationships allow us to improve the quality of our lives.
"Our social skills determine our destiny. It's as simple as that."
A growing number of businesses have taken to reminding customers to be considerate, especially when it comes to cell phone use.
Recent comments
What happened to the dress code part of the Honor Code at BYU? The...
BYU Professor | May 12, 2008 at 8:26 a.m.
I just wish that clerks would say "Thank You" after I give them money...
Bob Valentine | May 12, 2008 at 8:18 a.m.
The most amazing thing about your article is not the statistics, it...
S. R. | May 12, 2008 at 8:02 a.m.
- Obama, Soviet's Afghan endgame 1:04 a.m.
- Victims of Bhopal demand cleanup 12:55 a.m.
- Pakistanis kill 15 militants 12:47 a.m.
- SLCC campus briefs 12:24 a.m.
- Westminster campus briefs 12:22 a.m.
- SUU campus briefs 12:20 a.m.
- Sports on the air 12:12 a.m.
- Editorial: Buy local this Christmas 12:11 a.m.
- Conflicting advice for wise shopping 12:11 a.m.
- Half-baked nonstrategy will not work 12:11 a.m.
- Why is Y. ignoring spew of hatred?
- Unbeaten BYU takes trip to Logan
- Mitchell said to share LeBaron traits
- BCS just keeps dirty laundry on spin
- Teen girl killed in Kaysville crash
- Utahns growing tired of Bennett
- 2 citations issued at Y.-U. game
- Orem pair getting a rep for crime
- MWC awaits bowl destinations
- Simple candies for the holidays
- Hall mouths off about hate of Utah
914 - Cougars beat Utes in overtime
483 - Hall reprimanded by MWC
405 - Max Hall issues apology
392 - Hall's pain reflects self-betrayal
358 - Utes won't respond to Hall
278 - BYU says Hall incident resolved
244 - Why is Y. ignoring spew of hatred?
237 - 2 citations issued at Y.-U. game
184 - Religion in politics is tiresome
154
If you want to learn what it's like to be an astronaut on the...
First, a big thank you to all who posted questions here for me to ask...
As the TV cameras Tuesday night scanned the West Point audience during...
What a fun game to watch!! I love seeing the Aggs step up huge on defense. I...
Take of your Rose-colored glasses and watch the game again. Y'all got beat...
Hey guys... what does BYU and Swag have in common??......... They both get...
Way to go AGGIES!! Can't wait till UNLV comes into Provo and punks them again.
From an example of a law abiding citizen, Rodney King ..."U of U and BYU...
First, you must bleed that parched, ugly, awful royal blue, because that's...
I did not know anyone in the accident, I am not from this area; but the...
Yum...I want some now.
don't get me wrong, i have tons of respect for coach sloan and what he's done...
If we could only figure out a use ( like the presto-logs from sawdust ) for...




