Ministers around the state have been talking with their staffs and each other ever since, he said, noting their "disappointment, shame and sadness is very real. They're struggling with how people will perceive them, how their congregations will react and how it will affect them."

Knowing there will be "no cheap grace" in Haggard's future, the Rev. Johnson sent him an e-mail out of concern, without expecting a reply. The two met for the first time in Salt Lake City several weeks ago prior to Haggard's address to reporters, and they chatted again last month in St. Louis.

Haggard responded on Wednesday, thanking Johnson and admitting, "I'm a desperate man dependent upon God, and ... I'm sorry. Please forgive me for my failure." He quoted Philippians 1:15, asking the Rev. Johnson to "please pray for me that what has happened to me might lead to my deliverance."

Now repentant, Haggard "fought a demon in his own life and failed miserably. There's a clear sense of failure, sin and evil," the Rev. Johnson said. Critics will deride him as a fake or a hypocrite, and "there's not much you can say to someone who feels that way. On the other hand, I'm driven to say that the story of human failure is really the story of human history. The cool thing about being a Christian is the redemptive principle that there is a God who can forgive and heal."

Roy Gruber, senior pastor at Washington Heights Baptist Church in Ogden, said staffers there spent Wednesday's meeting talking about how Haggard fell and "recognizing that no one is off-limits. ... By the grace of God, there go we." They also discussed "how we can be there for one another and holding each other accountable in a positive way."

He said there is often very little accountability when religious leaders are operating independently, particularly when ministries and churches are growing rapidly. "It illustrates how we need one another and need to be connected to one another. Ultimately we must recognize we're completely dependent upon God."

The Rev. Gruber said the big question Haggard's fall will raise throughout Christianity is "how much of a disconnect is there in a vast majority of people who preach or teach certain things" with who they really are. While Haggard grabs headlines, the Rev. Gruber said his fall is also a reminder that "there are a lot of examples of people who have run the race well and not gone in that direction."

Fred Stoeker knows all too well what it means to live a lie. Now a best-selling Christian author who writes books for men trying to escape sexual addiction, pornography and failed family relationships, including "Tactics" and the "Every Man's Battle" series, Stoeker delved into porn as a lonely college student far from home.