From Deseret News archives:
What politicians are saying, and what they mean
As a public service to readers, we hereby provide the 2006 installment of what politicos are saying and what they really mean:
"After careful analysis, I have determined that Gov. Huntsman's dual option tax proposal holds tremendous benefit to the state." (The Guv wined and dined me at the governor's mansion, stroked my ego, asked how the kids are doing, and told me I was important.)
"I remain unpersuaded that Gov. Huntsman's dual option tax proposal is proper reform." (I want another lunch at the Governor's Mansion and more stroking.)
"I wanted to retire from public life, but because so many constituents begged me to stay, I am willing to make the sacrifice and run again." (I really enjoy the perks of the office, and I need the insurance.)
"I will never raise taxes!" (But I never said anything about revenue enhancements, income bracketing and fee adjustments.)
"I am steadfast in my defense of family values and the Constitution." (I don't want to discuss any of the hard issues.)
"I am here at your doorstep to listen to your concerns firsthand." (You don't want me bothering you, and I certainly don't want to be here, so let's make this painless: Take the brochure and don't ask any questions.)
"I am not beholden to special interest groups!" (Taking their money, free lunches, Jazz tickets and golf games isn't "beholden.")
"The pressing demands of elected office limit my participation in debates." (I'm ahead, so why give my opponent a forum?)
"I don't care how you vote, as long as you vote." (Please be impressed with my statesman-like posturing, no matter how insincere.)
"I'm looking forward to an invigorating campaign!" (I have to face another election!? Can't they just give it to me this time?)
"As a member of the minority party, I'm committed to diversity and political balance." (I can't get any bills passed, so what else can I say?)
Comments
- Max Hall: a fixture in rivalry lore 9:48 p.m.
- Penguins snap lengthy skid 9:45 p.m.
- USU's Turbin wins WAC accolades 9:43 p.m.
- Prep basketball ready for change 9:42 p.m.
- Preps of the Week 9:40 p.m.
- Grid Picks winners 9:38 p.m.
- MWC '09 season in review 9:38 p.m.
- Jazz clobber Grizzlies 9:28 p.m.
- Prep boys basketball top 20 9:24 p.m.
- Jazz ready to be without Harpring 9:24 p.m.
- Hall's pain reflects self-betrayal
- Y. student vanished in China
- Max Hall issues apology
- Utes won't respond to Hall
- Hall reprimanded by MWC
- Cougs begin bowl preparations
- Boy shot following traffic stop
- Mitchell called intelligent, controlling
- Matthews passes new Jazz tests
- U. eyes bowl for redemption
- Hall mouths off about hate of Utah
898 - Cougars beat Utes in overtime
481 - Max Hall issues apology
376 - Hall reprimanded by MWC
359 - Hall's pain reflects self-betrayal
307 - Utes won't respond to Hall
250 - BYU is champion of the state
140 - Man trapped in Nutty Putty cave dies
121 - Cave to be sealed with body inside
119 - Religion in politics is tiresome
107
Live 'Twittologue' Dec. 2, 4:00 p.m. with Jason Chaffetz. Click for more.
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