What is it about our busy lives that cause us to spout angry words like a geyser? At the drop of a hat we can spew nastiness all over our loved ones, friends and even total strangers.

I have heard every excuse in the world for the angry words that come from our mouths.

They start with, "I had a bad day," "I didn't get much sleep" and the worst is, "You made me do it." This excuse is no different from the abusive husband who blames his wife because she made him hit her.

I will never forget a testimonial we received from a mother who sent her child out into the world with angry words ringing in his ears. Those angry words were the last words he ever heard from his mother because he was killed when a car ran over him. There is no excuse for ever allowing abusive language to hurt anyone.

Think back to when you were a child. Can you remember some hurtful words that were yelled at you in anger? When a room full of people of all ages was asked this question they could recount the event as if it were yesterday. Angry words linger and fester! They cannot be taken back. They leave your lips and scar people for life!

I want to get to the basis of this ill behavior. This is just what it is! I think it is because you are not getting your naps. We all know how our babies act when they have not had their naps. Lack of sleep makes us cranky, angry, fat, sick, sidetracked and unable to concentrate. These are some of the symptoms we experience from our inability to go to bed, shut our brains off and get the rest that our bodies need.

There are lots of reasons we do not get enough sleep. It could be that you don't go to bed at a decent hour or when you do go to bed your mind will not shut off. You may need to see your doctor for some help. Another reason is that you have sleep apnea. Your doctor can help you with this too. I am a light sleeper and have discovered that wearing earplugs has helped me to get a good night's sleep.

These earplugs keep me from hearing every little noise in the house. Not only have I had more energy, but I think this is one of the reasons I have reduced my Body Clutter. I have started to dream again and feel refreshed when I get up in the morning. Not everyone can do this because of being alone in the house or having babies. A white noise machine can also help you to sleep better.

Now let's look at what happens around you when you have this ill attitude: Your children run for cover, your husband has learned to ignore you and your co-workers give you a wide berth. Then you compound the lack of good sleep with the stress that we place on ourselves with perfectionism. It's a wonder we can stand ourselves. You know that may be real problem.

When we don't like ourselves, we don't do what we need to do to stop this vicious cycle of "No sleep, stress and sour" Attitudes.

I want you to find peace. We can't have this peace if we are lashing out at our family in anger.

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Marla Cilley, a k a FlyLady, is the author of "Sink Reflections" (Bantam Books Trade Paperback). For more help, please go to: www.FlyLady.net. © 2006