Death ends teen's lifetime of struggles

"I tried to tell the teacher that, but he wouldn't budge," she said. "He had to have his grades in."

J.J. ended up with a B for the semester, an acceptable mark for most students. He saw it as failure.

Report cards came out Tuesday, Nov. 15. J.J. received his in first-period history, either before or after making a class presentation. He drove home sometime before noon, skipping lunch with a former girlfriend with whom he hoped to get back together.

Riverton High junior Jordan Baier could sense something wrong with his friend the week before he died. J.J. told him it was nothing. Baier said he thought he was down about breaking up with his girlfriend.

But he apparently talked with other friends about killing himself. They didn't believe him. They told him how he could do it. They flippantly told him to "go kill yourself" then.

That's not the right thing to say to anyone who makes suicidal threats. It might be lethal to someone whose mind takes things literally.

Last October, Riverton High senior Blake Eggett took his life. J.J. and Blake weren't friends, but they knew each other through band. George and Darla Serassio said that other than expressing sadness, J.J. didn't say much about Blake's death. He gave them no inkling he was thinking about doing the same thing.

No one can really point to one incident and say that's what caused a child to take his or her life.

"Suicide is a multifaceted, complex issue," said Susan Chilton, Jordan School District student intervention services director. "There are all kinds of things that go into why that person is filled with despair."

The cruel teasing didn't cause J.J. to take his life. Nor did the B in chemistry or the breakup with his girlfriend. It wasn't the disappointment of not being on the high school basketball team. It wasn't because he was short.

"All of those things separate and distinct don't necessarily result in the suicide," said Lainhart, who never met J.J. but wishes she had. "Throw depression in on top of that (and) that can be the tipping point."

The Monday night before he died was typical of an LDS family. He read from the Book of Mormon with his parents for family home evening. He also typed out his Christmas list after surfing the Internet for the best prices. A keyless entry and a spoiler for his Camaro topped the list. He watched the Dallas Cowboys' improbable comeback against the Philadelphia Eagles on Monday Night Football.

George Serassio tries not to dwell on his son's death.

"I don't place any blame on family. It was his choice. I know that he knows that he made a mistake. I have a feeling that if he could take it back . . . but you can't take it back. Fear was not part of his vocabulary. He needed to experience more of life. He just didn't get that chance."

The Serassios' feelings about what happened to their son remain tender. Darla Serassio tears up easily. She also becomes angry when she talks about her son's struggles.

"It takes a village to raise a child," she said, "and it takes that same village to destroy a child."

And the wont to destroy didn't end with J.J's death.

The telephone rang at the Serassio home the night before his funeral.

"You know where J.J. is?" the caller asked. And then, laughter.

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