Bridging the divide

Consciously or not, religious identity is pervasive in Utah, whether or not residents claim any belief in God, according to religion scholar and LDS observer Jan Shipps, who has studied demographics and religious fervor in the Beehive State. Because The Church of Jesus of Christ of Latter-day Saints is so dominant here, everyone has a religious identity, said Shipps, professor emeritus of history and religious studies at Indiana University-Purdue University. "Even people who don't claim to be anything when they come to Utah find out they are something — they're either Mormon or not." So pervasive has the identity issue become that often the first question asked of both new residents and Utahns visiting outside the state is, "Are you a Mormon?"

Assumptions — both positive and negative — usually follow, according to participants. Kesler said the object of the small discussion groups has been to go beyond those assumptions.

Five participants shared their experience with the Deseret Morning News.

Nila Horton, an insurance company consultant and native Utahn, has lived in her east-side Salt Lake neighborhood for 32 years. The fact that she and her family are not LDS -— and steered clear of the church despite attempts at proselytizing — has had a lasting impact on her life. "We've had some wonderful experiences, but also some very negative ones that I don't want anyone else to go through," she said.

The negative came largely as the result of her children's experiences when they were young, being routinely excluded from birthday parties, baby-sitting opportunities and chances to date Latter-day Saints in their heavily LDS area. "It makes kids wonder why they're not good enough to participate.

"I have to tell you, nothing huge happened. We've never been shot at or been fired from our jobs."

While the nuances and slights have been minor, she said, they accumulated regularly over a lifetime to fill a reservoir of hurt. By the time Salt Lake's religious divide project was announced, Horton was ready to talk to someone — anyone — about her experience. The pain had finally turned from annoyance and tolerance to anger — and a determination that "I can't do this anymore without speaking out."

When she attended the city forums, "I didn't know what to expect — whether I was going to be angry or excluded. But I was comforted by what I heard other people say over and over again. They were things I had felt for years but never had an audience for it. For me, it was truly a beginning," including the understanding she gained from Latter-day Saints in her group about their feelings of being unfairly stereotyped or judged.

She said she would do "almost anything" to ensure that the dialogue continues.

Chuck Spence, deputy director for government contracting in the governor's office, said his group found the experience so helpful that group member decided to continue meeting beyond the formal religious divide project and now gather every six weeks.