Neilson said she and people like her are not asking for a blank check from the state to take care of her son so she doesn't have to. Rather, the money would provide services that would at the very least set her up with respite care, so she can take a break, or at the most, set Matt up with his own place to live, so the rest of the Neilsons don't live in fear.

"Am I afraid? Yes. Is there anywhere else to turn? No. Our option is to call the police."

The waiting has gone on for six years while they have been on the DSPD list and no hope is in sight — at least for the Neilsons. Advocates for people with disabilities have for years lobbied the budget makers at the Legislature, saying state funding is woefully inadequate and forces families into desperate situations.

George Kellner, acting director of the DSPD, acknowledges the needs are great and said as long as he has been with the agency, there has been a waiting list. That's been 12 years. "There's not enough money," he said.

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E-mail: amyjoi@desnews.com