From Deseret News archives:

Web hot in LDS singles scene

But sex assaults spur warning from operators of sites

Published: Sunday, Oct. 17, 2004 10:29 p.m. MDT
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"It feels nice to be in a place where people hold the same values, or at least you expect they do," said Kevin Koger, vice president of business development for LDSSingles.com. "I think people do feel a little safer, and, unfortunately, cases like this make it appear that we need to keep up those same guards and barriers as we would anywhere else we might be."

Most LDS singles sites state that users must be faithful members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, but site operators must rely mainly on other users to report violations of the policy.

LDSSingles.com was not the site on which the women met their alleged attackers, but Koger says there are no guarantees that something similar won't happen again.

"No site like ours can prevent people from doing whatever they're planning to do, and we can't gauge their intent, but we do take it very seriously, and it's something that we hope we can avoid ever happening, but again, we try," he said. "Unfortunately, this, I'm afraid, will happen once in a while, on online dating sites, whether it's on an LDS site or elsewhere, and it does happen elsewhere."

Woodhouse said that it is not the number of Internet-related sexual assaults that are increasing but the number of people who meet online.

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"I would say it's increasing only because that's an increasing way people are trying to meet others," she said. "This is just another way they're meeting people, but the majority of the rape victims that we work with are assaulted by someone that they know."

Scoresby cited one industry source that said about 18 million to 40 million people click on to a singles Web site on a regular basis.

"The dating business throughout the country has grown so fast and so large it's a little shocking," he said. "Those large numbers are probably one reason why we see more of these awful but sensational stories about assaults."

Site operators stress that they do their best to caution members about face-to-face meetings with people they have met virtually on the Internet.

"We have built into the site several cautionary statements that are very clear and direct about when people should meet and under what circumstances, and when they shouldn't meet," Scoresby said.

Most singles sites, LDS or not, provide members with tips to help them stay safe when they opt to meet in person. Meeting in a public place during daylight hours, having your own transportation, and not moving to a private location are a few of the tips sites offer.

One mainstream singles site, True.com, takes safety a step further, performing criminal background checks and marriage status verification on each member. The site is lobbying nationally to encourage legislation requiring all sites to do the same, or at least state that they do not.

"Because of all the horrible things that have happened, we think that there should be better protection for people that meet online, so we're trying to do something about it," said Bill Rathburn, advisory board security consultant for True.com.

Scoresby pointed out that a woman could be sexually assaulted by a man she meets anywhere, not only online.

"The same tragic events can happen in any environment," Scoresby said, "And I'm not protecting the industry; I'm just saying that's the climate of our time."

Koger agreed. "This could happen no matter where you meet, unfortunately, whether it's at a bar or a church dance," he said.


E-mail: mdecker@desnews.com

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