Time to pucker up and kiss babies

"I will accept the decision of the voters." (This is the most humiliating day of my life!)

"I will run a grass-roots campaign." (I can't afford television.)

"Nothing is more important to me than my integrity." (But getting re-elected is mighty close.)

"We need a leader with vision!" (I envision myself some day in the governor's mansion.)

"I will fight for your interests." (As long as they don't get in the way of re-election.)

"Four more years! Four more years!" (And then I run for governor!)

"I pledge a completely open administration." (I'd love to ban those pesky reporters from my office.)

"I believe in limited government." (Except when I need big government for my priorities.)

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Republican LaVarr Webb was policy deputy to Gov. Mike Leavitt and Deseret News managing editor. He now is a political consultant and lobbyist. E-mail: lwebb@exoro.com. Democrat Frank Pignanelli is Salt Lake attorney, lobbyist and political adviser. A recent candidate for Salt Lake mayor, Pignanelli served 10 years in the Utah House of Representatives, six years as House Minority Leader. E-mail: frankp@xmission.com.