Deseret News | Dave Barry's 2003 Holiday Gift Guide

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Dave Barry's 2003 Holiday Gift Guide

By Dave Barry

Published: Thursday, Dec. 18, 2003 5:11 p.m. MST

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$6.99 plus shipping and handling from ThinkGeek Inc., 10801 Main, Suite 700, Fairfax, VA 22030, phone: 888-GEEKSTUFF, phone: 433-5788, Internet: www.thinkgeek.com

— Suggested by Karen Durkin of Pottsville, Pa.

We've all exclaimed the following exclamation a million times: "I wish there was some way I could absorb caffeine directly into my body while showering!"

Well, now there "is" a way, in the form of Shower Shock brand caffeinated soap. Each four-ounce bar of Shower Shock contains enough caffeine to provide the consumer with 200 milligrams of caffeine per shower, for 12 showers. The manufacturer states that this caffeine "is absorbed through the skin."

This breakthrough concept will make a fine gift for those people on your holiday list who do not have time to drink coffee manually, or simply dislike it. When these people need a quick "pick-me-up" at work or school, all they have to do is remove their clothing, pour some water on themselves, whip out their bar of Shower Shock and lather up. Then they're back to work, feeling refreshed and alert. This will be helpful when they talk to the police.

Hair-Cutting Umbrella

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$7.98 plus shipping and handling from Harriet Carter, 425 Stump Road, North Wales, PA 19454, phone: 800-377-7878, Internet: www.harrietcarter.com

—Suggested by Emily Phares of Franktown, Colo.

If you are like many people, you are constantly on the lookout for a gift idea that not only is practical but also makes the wearer's head looking like a human cheese ball on an hors d'oeuvres platter.

Well, look no farther than this amazing hair-cutting umbrella. It is designed to be worn during home haircuts, to prevent the hair from falling on the home-haircut victim. But we here at the Gift Guide think this item would look good anywhere, as well as providing many practical benefits. For example, have you ever been at the movies, and you grab a handful of popcorn, but when you put it in your mouth, some of the popcorn falls out? Sure you have. And usually, to retrieve that popcorn, you have to root around between your thighs. Well, if you were wearing this haircutting umbrella, that popcorn would be easily accessible, right around the base of your neck, mingling with flakes of your dandruff!

There are countless other uses for this fine product. We can't even count them, that's how many there are.

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