Help wanted: Coach with some real pizazz

Now that Brent Guy has been fired as Utah State's football coach, is there honestly a possibility the Aggies can become a respectable team?

Will people actually be able to walk around wearing Utah State gear without getting egged?

Of course they will.

All they need — to borrow a Steve Martin phrase — is a wild and craaazy guy.

Or at least someone who makes people want to dance.

USU is searching for its sixth coach in the last 16 years, and the biggest question is how it can become more than just a good place to watch leaves change in autumn. It hasn't had a winning season in 12 years. It has won just two conference championships since 1979. Guy's 8-38 record is the worst in school history. He should have been gone a year ago, but that's another story. Now the search is on to find someone to lead the Aggies out of the wilderness.

USU hasn't been wandering 40 years — like the ancient Israelites — but it's close. The last coach to have back-to-back winning seasons was Bruce Snyder, who led the Aggies to 7-3-1 and 6-5 seasons in 1979-80. But he got out of town ahead of the collapse. So USU is out shopping again. Seems to be a biennual thing. The Aggies will want to find a good coach, which they may or may not have had in Guy. He seemed to know the game, but his schemes weren't terribly imaginative. Or effective. And he had zero charisma.

What USU needs now is not just a great coach, but a great personality. It needs someone who can make the Aggie faithful — both general fans and wealthy boosters — believe.

Charismatic coaches bring in donor money and fans, and they bring wins. Or is it the other way around?

Several names have been tossed around as Guy's replacement. Smith — yes, same coach who was in Logan before — was in town several weeks ago when the Aggies played Utah. The explanation was (wink, wink) that Smith was out West to attend a Weber State alumni function and see the new Laub Athletics Complex.

And while Smith certainly has personality, he sometimes has too much — like for instance the time when he was coaching at Michigan State and slapped himself in a press conference. And the time he stormed off the field, telling a TV reporter, "The kids are playing their tail(s) off and the coaches are screwing it up!"

Still, bringing back someone who has coached at two BCS schools (Louisville and MSU) would certainly drum up interest.